She Could Do Better
by Pearl Squirrel
Summary: Hiccup and Astrid are forced to get married against their will. Astrid's never been so emotionally unstable in her life and Hiccup can't tell what's scarier: his wife-to-be and her axe or that Night Fury he's hiding in the woods.
1. They Find Out

**Title: She Could Do Better**

 **Summary: Hiccup and Astrid are forced to get married against their wills. Astrid's never been so emotionally unstable in her life and Hiccup can't tell what's scarier: his wife-to-be and her axe or that Night Fury he's hiding in the woods.**

 **Word Count: 3,604**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own HTTYD**

 **...**

 **1\. They Find Out**

* * *

Hiccup yawned and rubbed his eyes tiredly as he trudged back to his house. It'd been a long day; he started off by waking up early because his dad wanted him to fix a hole in the roof that'd been forgotten from the last dragon raid, and he fell off the ladder twice and smashed most of his fingers while attempting to use a hammer. Then he hobbled into the forge and spent a few hours making and sharpening weapons before sneaking off to the back room to work on the design for his new dragon-trapping invention which, once he made a few tweaks, he had a good feeling would _actually_ catch a dragon this time. But the machine was very sensitive and he ended up having to untangle himself from bolas at least seven times. Probably more, but he'd hit his head too many times to remember- so many, in fact, that by the time he gave up, he realized that he hadn't eaten all day, and the Great Hall was closed for the night.

So here he was, bruised and hungry and miserable, and when he opened the front door and heard his father humming happily as he stoked the fire, he figured it was about to get worse.

"Evenin' son," Stoick sang happily, dropping the stoke and sitting down in his chair.

Hiccup stared at him and tried to smile, but it came out more as a grimace. "Hey... Dad."

He motioned to the chair beside his, smile still plastered on his hairy face. "Sit down, I want to have a chat with you."

"Oh, uh," Hiccup grasped for an excuse, "I'd love to talk but I've had a really long day and could really use-"

"It will only take a few minutes, and then you can get back to whatever it is you do in that room of yours." Stoick laughed heartily, but for the life of him Hiccup couldn't understand what was so funny.

"He he, yeah." Hiccup scratched the back of his head before sighing. He traipsed over to the seat by the fire, stumbling slightly as his father thrust a cup of hot tea into his hands.

He was about to let out an insincere 'thank you,' but Stoick wasted no time. "So how do you like that friend of yours, the Hofferson girl?"

Hiccup fought the overwhelming urge to spit his tea out all over the place. He gulped heavily and his breath shook as his head became dizzy. There must've been some rule somewhere that reiterated the fact that the words 'Hofferson' and 'friend' were not allowed to be used together in the same sentence when talking about Hiccup. He looked back at Stoick incredulously, wondering if he was pulling his leg, but the older man just sat forward with with bated breath. Either his father really was that oblivious, or he was aware that Hiccup and Astrid had never had an actual conversation with each other but didn't want to acknowledge his son's incapacity to make friends any more than he wanted to admit that he and Hiccup shared the same blood. He didn't know which one was more offensive.

Hiccup shifted, trying to come up with a reply. _I don't know, she's fast. She's fierce. She's aggressive. She's stunning. She's strong. She's everything you hoped I would be since the day I was born._ "She's nice."

Stoick beamed. "Fantastic! Then I suppose we won't have a problem."

He shifted again. "Why might we have a problem...?"

His father just chuckled and handed over a folded piece of paper. Hiccup looked between the paper in his hand and the unnervingly excited man before him before he set down his tea, unfolded the paper and stared at the page.

It only took him two seconds to realize that the runes on the top of the page spelled out 'Marriage Contract,' and his heartbeat screeched to a halt. The dizzying in his head became blurringly fast and he could barely make out his and Astrid's names and a few pretty official looking signatures on the bottom. He probably would've dropped it in the fire had Stoick not mistaken his shock for one of excitement and gently taken the paper from his hands. "That's why I asked you fix the roof this morning, so I could go to the Hoffersons' and seal the deal. Isn't this great? Your future has hope yet!"

Hiccup's throat constricted and he blinked rapidly as he looked down at his bandaged hands from that morning, which were now clenching and unclenching into fists in anxiety. His mind was on overdrive. Astrid- him- he- they- _what-_

Astrid- _Astrid Hofferson was going to be his wife and-_

So sure he _might've_ wanted to marry her one day because she was pretty and awesome a much better option than Ruffnut but it wasn't really that _realistic_ because she wasn't particularly _nice_ to anyone and how the Hel was he supposed to marry someone who had never even looked him in the eyes throughout their entire fifteen years of life, except maybe sometimes when she went to the forge to get her axe sharpened every _few days_ because she just wore it out _that much_ , and he really thought that he would have had the time to eventually get over her but now they were getting _married_ and he was _going to die_ and his father had the freaking audacity to sit there and _laugh_ and-

He tried to speak. "Hhrrrmphllk."

Stoick laughed, clearly not paying any attention to Hiccup's fearful eyes whatsoever. "That's my boy! Now go along to bed, it's getting late."

Before he knew it, Hiccup was getting hoisted to his feet and handed back his cup of tea. He resisted the inordinate urge to pour the scalding hot sand-water all over his father's stupid red beard-face and climbed up the stairs with an acutely distinct aura of defeat that- of course- went straight over his father's gleeful head and right up to the cackling gods in Valhalla.

He really wasn't all that tired anymore.

* * *

Astrid walked down the steps the next morning, her familiar axe swinging from her hand. Her boots hit the bottom with a muffled 'thud' and she was about to head out the door to breakfast when her mother looked up from the fireplace. Many people said Astrid looked like a younger, happier version of Ingrid Hofferson, whose golden hair was getting duller by the day and whose eyes never seemed to ever be fully alight. Astrid could never see it, partially because she didn't really like being related to anything with or about her mother, but she had to say that the firelight make Ingrid's face glow pleasantly and it took years off her features. "Oh, going so soon?"

The younger girl looked over her shoulder, her braid swishing across her back. "I'm late for breakfast."

"Can breakfast wait for a few more moments?" Ingrid looked at her almost intensely. "I need... to talk to you about something."

The foreign hint of anxiety in her mother's voice caught Astrid off guard. "Um..."

"Please, doll, it's urgent."

Astrid hadn't heard her mother call her 'doll' since her father died. She blinked, racking her brain for what could possibly be so important, but coming up with nothing of value. She rubbed a hand to her head. "Are you sure it can't wait?"

Ingrid opened her mouth to say something, but the intensity in her gaze crumbled and she gave her daughter a weak smile. "I suppose it can wait until bedtime..."

"I'll see you then," Astrid promised, giving a false grin before rushing out of the house and slamming the door behind her. She didn't see her mother collapse into her chair by the fire and pull out the small sack of money that held as much weight in her hand as it did in her heart, nor did her mother see the novel look of confusion that clouded her daughter's face as she walked to the Hall.

 **...**

"Oh, hey Astrid," Fishlegs chimed as the Hofferson girl sat down across from him, next to Ruffnut. "We were wondering when you'd get here."

"Hey Fishlegs," she greeted calmly, placing down her plate. She felt like she should be worrying about her mother more but when she looked down at her food she decided to put her thoughts away for the time being.

Snotlout picked up his mug and took a drink. "Do you want to come with us to the beach later? We were gonna go spar and chill out, maybe take a dip in the water..." He winked at her and that stupid shit-eating grin spread across his face. The twins made exaggerated gagging noises and he whipped his head towards them. "Shut up. You're just jealous that what we have is special."

Astrid glanced outside. In truth it was a nicer day than they'd been having recently- not to say that it wasn't still cold outside- but it had gone from freezing to reasonably chilly. It wouldn't be a bad day to spend by the ocean.

"I'll go," she sighed, and Snotlout's entire face lit up enough to rival the sun- clearly not expecting her to agree. "But I'm keeping my clothes on. And you are too or so help me." His face fell a few notches but he was nonetheless pleased.

Ruffnut turned to her. "Do you wanna spar with me first? My parents got me an extra cool hammer as an early birthday present and I can't wait to whip your axe-swinging ass."

Astrid rolled her eyes and took a bite of her food. "I'd like to see you try."

She picked her friend's axe up off the table. "Please, this thing's so dull, I could beat you one handed."

Tuffnut snagged the axe from his sister's hands and twirled the weapon around in his hand. "Ha ha, I couldn't cut through mutton with this thing."

Astrid wrenched it from his hand and thwacked him in the head. "If it's so dull, you wouldn't mind letting me test it out, would you?"

He squeaked. "Actually, it looks sharp. Really really sharp. So sharp, in fact, that you should probably put it away, so no one accidentally cuts themself on it, or something."

Ruffnut sniggered. "Yes. _Accidentally_."

A few minutes later, the others were finished eating and anxious to run down to the beach. Astrid told them to go ahead without her while she finished, and they bid her goodbye before shoving each other to reach the doors first. She took her time finishing her meal and putting her plate away before walking out of the almost-empty Hall by herself.

The walk to the beach wasn't very long. She just had to walk down the street, past the bakery and armory and make a left at the forge-

She froze outside the forge and glanced down at her axe before looking up at the barn. Her axe really was looking dull, and she realized that it'd been more than a few days since her last sharpening and one was long overdue. Her friends wouldn't miss her if she was gone a few minutes longer.

Astrid looked at the closed shutters of the booth and dropped her axe, letting it clatter on the counter noisily. She heard a loud 'bang' followed by a cry of pain and a few muffled noises before the shutters flew open. Hiccup had his head down and was sorely rubbing his scalp. He glanced up and looked at her almost passively before looking down again. Then he went stark still and looked up at her wildly, gaping like a fish.

For the second time that day, Astrid was caught off guard. She had never seen Hiccup look at her so alarmedly, and she immediately took it offensively. "I'd appreciate it if I could get my axe sharpened without getting stared at like I'm a freaking dragon."

Hiccup blinked and then snapped out of that trance or whatever he was in. His cheeks blushed as dark as his auburn hair and he cowered in on himself. "Aah, um- ther- uh- uh. Sharpen. Yes. Um."

Astrid just stared and Hiccup cowered even further. When his eyes darted down to the axe on the table, his brows furrowed slightly in confusion and he looked up at her warily. She kept staring at him apathetically, but her tone was much more accusing. "What?"

Instead of cowering away again, he just kept staring at her, almost incredulously so, his green eyes completely devoid of any guilt or embarrassment that they'd housed just seconds prior. Astrid was ready to just up and leave, deciding she'd fulfilled her due quota of interactions with the chief's son for the next couple of years before he startlingly slapped one hand around the handle and slowly pulled the axe towards himself, never daring to break eye contact. It was as if he expected her to leap over the counter, grab her weapon and bash him senseless until she could reach into his dead body and skip rope with his intestines. Very quickly beginning to regret ever coming here in the first place, Astrid's eye twitched- a tick usually reserved for the twins and Snotlout- and Hiccup, unprepared for a threatening advance of such magnitude, leapt seven feet in the air before snatching the axe to his body with wide eyes and scurrying to the whetstone.

Astrid crossed her arms over her chest impatiently, exhaling through her nose with more force than necessary. Usually she could handle Hiccup's stupidity- his sarcasm and screw-ups and whatnots- but _this_ \- whatever it was- was too much. He didn't look at her as he turned the wheel and watched out for stray sparks, seemingly milking as much time as he could to stall having to face her again. Finally he stopped sharpening and, almost as if he were in a dream, handed it out to her. Astrid snatched it from his hands with a glare and, without so much as a 'thank you,' marched off with her head held higher than her hope in Hiccup would ever be.

Looking numbly at her departing figure, Hiccup crumpled and slid down to the dirty stone floor of the forge, caressing his head in his hands as he waited for his temporary relief to guide his poor heart from his throat back into his chest.

 _She doesn't know. She has no idea._

 **...**

Astrid returned home from the beach with a newfound sense of tranquility. Her earlier frustration had left her body along with the waves on the beach as she sparred with Ruffnut (and won- but really, no one should have been surprised), ignored Snotlout, let Fishlegs talk about some book he read, and looked away from Tuffnut as he ran into the water naked (but really, no one should have been surprised). She also managed to peel away and get a good hour or two of axe-throwing before returning to the beach to enjoy the last rays of sunlight.

As she walked up to her house, she could see that her mother was sitting by the window, waiting for her arrival. Her pace slowed and the scowl returned to her face. She walked slowly up the creaky porch steps and stood in front of the door for a few seconds before pushing it open.

Her mother was on her feet instantly and was in front of Astrid before she even closed the door. Astrid was used to her mother being overbearing, but something was wrong now.

"How was your day?" Ingrid asked nervously, but from the sound of her voice it seemed like she was stalling.

"Mom, what's wrong?" Astrid demanded.

"Wrong? Nothing's wrong." Her daughter crossed her arms over her chest. She sighed. "I think we should sit down."

Astrid slowly sat across from her fidgeting mother. She had never seen her mother so nervous to tell her something, even when she sat Astrid down a few years ago to tell her that her father was gone. Astrid didn't like the fact that she was associating this level of visible fear with something as bad as or worse than the death of her father.

Ingrid clasped her hands together in her lap. They had a very slight tremor. "Astrid, doll, you know that things have been rough for us ever since your father passed..."

Again with that nickname. Astrid still didn't like where this was going, especially now that her mother was bringing their financial stability into it. She knew that they were definitely worse for wear than most families, but it was only the two of them, and there was no such thing as a rich Viking.

"...and I'm so grateful to have a daughter as resourceful as you. We've already managed three years by ourselves. But, now..."

She shifted. "Now what?"

Ingrid exhaled. "We're sunk, Astrid. We have been for a few months, and I tried to keep it from you, hoping that maybe I could make it better, but it's only been going downhill and it's reached a point where I've had to make decisions while I still can."

Astrid was silent for a moment. She should be worrying about how her mother had just told her that they were bankrupt and it was basically her fault, but... but something wasn't adding up. "...Decisions?"

Her mother closed her eyes, looking as if she felt ill. "You're just a child, but you have so much potential. You should hear the way the adults exalt you. I could never be more proud to call you my daughter, and it's only fair that someone as gifted as you would get an equally gifted future. One that, unfortunately, I can no longer provide for you unless I get help."

She looked down at her boots. They were still covered in sand and she realized subconsciously through her slowly and inevitably building panic that she forgot to stomp them out before walking in the house. "I'm not following."

The woman was silent for a few minutes. Then Astrid heard her reach behind her and pull out something that made a series of muffled clinking noises. She looked up and saw her mother holding a dark purple sack the size of her palm with a brown drawstring. Ingrid tossed it to her and she caught it effortlessly before pulling it open and looking inside. It was gold, and a lot of it. She wondered what this could possibly mean, but when she looked up her mother had tears in her eyes, and after a few moments of recalling her mother's words and staring at the large sum of money, she suddenly _knew_.

The sack tumbled from Astrid's hands and a few coins spilled out onto the floor. Her eyes were wide and suddenly the whole room went as cold as ice. She scrambled to her feet, digging her fingers into her scalp and pulling her hair as she tried to remember how to breathe.

"Who?" she gasped, her body shaking. "Who?!"

Ingrid pulled her limbs in closer, making herself seem that much smaller. Her answer came out so quiet she almost didn't hear, but there was no mistaking it. "Hiccup."

Astrid's hands dropped from her head and fell limply at her sides. She stared blankly at her mother as she tried to explain. "Stoick knew that our situation was dire and he came up with the idea of a marriage. He was willing to exchange a copious bride price for very little dowry in return and once you're married you'll have an amazing future set out for you. It's a better bargain than I could have ever hoped to get from anyone else-"

"Stop." Astrid shut her eyes. "Just stop."

Ingrid shut her mouth.

Astrid's stomach was turning violently and her once ice-cold body was now heating up as hot as the fire in the fireplace. She recalled from earlier that day how Hiccup was acting stranger than and she realized he must've known, must've realized she didn't know, and still didn't tell her. Now she felt like the idiot. She wanted to scream, she wanted to drive her axe straight through her mother's pitiful face, but in the end she could barely whisper, " _How could you?_ "

Her mother broke. She started to cry. "I panicked, Astrid. I had no choice-"

"That's not an answer." _There was a choice. There is always a choice. You're just weak._

"Doll-"

"Don't call me that."

"Please, Astrid-"

Astrid backed away steadily without breaking eye contact. She picked up her axe and shook her head, her blue eyes darkened with rage and betrayal. She could practically hear her mother's heart crack in two, but she wouldn't stay around to watch her unravel. She threw the door open and slammed it shut behind her, ignoring her her mother's pleas for her to come back.

* * *

 **I didn't intend for this to take such an upsetting turn, but what better way to start off a story than on an ominous note?**

 **(Also I swore to myself I wouldn't start another story until I updates SaS, but who am I to withhold this work of art just because of the inevitability of my procrastination?)**

 **Next Chapter : Hiccup better watch out and you can bet it's not because Santa's coming to town.**


	2. Sleepless Night

**Word Count: 3,158**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own HTTYD**

 **...**

 **2\. Sleepless Night**

* * *

Sunlight filtered through the window of the twins' bedroom early in the morning, causing them to wake up as the bright rays shone into their eyes. Tuffnut groaned and rolled off his bed onto the floor, and Ruffnut turned onto her stomach and put her pillow over her head. It was safe to say that, amongst other things, the Thorston twins were not morning people.

"Tuffnut, I told you board up the window _days_ ago."

"I was going to, but then we crushed up all the wood for our splinter bombs and Dad never got any more."

Ruff groaned and chucked her pillow at her brother before rolling off her bed to join him in his despair on the floor. "Then what do you do? You go out into the forest and chop up some more yourself."

Tuffnut rolled his head over to her with a scowl. "I was going to, but then I remembered that _you_ existed and was too depressed to do anything."

The sister twin sat up instantly, ready to slam her hammer through his skull, but then slumped down just as quickly. "Ah, I'm too tired. I'll kill you after breakfast."

It took a while, but after spending almost an hour of suffering through their existential crises and contemplating why 'waking up' had to even exist (as was, unsurprisingly, routine for them every morning), the two of them sat up and shrugged on some fresh clothes before grabbing their helmets and half-heartedly shoving each other as they traipsed down the stairs. Scarface and Tuffnut Sr. were bright and early risers, unlike a certain two children of theirs, and it was safe to assume that if they weren't sitting downstairs that they were already at work. It's a wonder that two of the calmest and most professional Vikings on the island could produce... well, whatever _they_ were. No one was really sure.

Tuff pulled open the door and Ruff shoved him so she could get out first. The sunlight was _blinding_ , and the girl rubbed her eyes as she stepped forward, expecting her boot to step on the wooden porch but instead finding it on something uneven and squishy. She looked down and saw that she was not, in fact, stepping on the porch, but rather she was stepping on a body.

She didn't scream, but she did jump backwards and crash into Tuffnut, who lost his footing and caused the both of them to topple to the ground. Ruffnut sat up and fixed her helmet, ignoring her brother's moans and complaints, and crawled over to the undeterred person on their porch. Their back was facing the doorway, but she could recognize that blond braid anywhere.

"Tuffnut, did you kill Astrid?"

He sat up, rubbing his nose, sounding offended by her accusatory tone. "I did no such thing."

She cocked her head and poked her friend, who just slumped to the side. "I don't know, she seems pretty dead to me."

Tuffnut crawled to his sister's side and assumed the same position. He tried poking Astrid himself, but received no response. "Well if she's dead, I didn't kill her. Why are you trying to pin this on me?"

"Because you're the only person insane enough to kill a Hofferson."

He scratched his chin before widening his eyes in realization and scrambling to his feet. "Oh no, I can't back to jail!"

Ruffnut didn't hold her breath. "Tuff, you've never-"

Her brother started pacing back and forth, his hands clutching his helmet. "I'll have to run away, hide in the mountains-"

"Tuff-"

"-I'll never be able to return, I don't want to put you or our parents in danger-"

"Tuffnut-"

"-I'll have to shave my head and wear sackcloth- but don't worry I'll still be more attractive than you-"

Astrid groaned and rolled over, rubbing her forehead. "Can you _please-_ "

He leapt backwards and pulled a small dagger out of his pocket and pointed it at her. "YOU CAN'T PROVE ANY- oh. Yikes. Sorry Astrid."

The addressed girl didn't say anything. She just turned her back to them as she sat up, swung her legs over the porch and stretched almost casually, seemingly not planning on offering any form of explanation whatsoever. Ruffnut stared at her skeptically. "What in the gods' names were you doing asleep on our porch?"

Astrid looked over at the twin for the first time, and stared at her as if only just noticing her presence. Then she looked away again and sighed. "I was only there for two or three hours. Your parents were gone and you guys were still sleeping, and I didn't feel like dealing with the emotional toll of the fit you two would give me for waking you up."

Ruffnut lowered herself down on the edge of the porch next to Astrid and glanced her way. Her eyes appeared bloodshot from exhaustion and her clothes were disheveled and sweaty. There were woodchips sticking out of her clothes and hair here and there, and there was a long scrape on her left bicep that looked shallow, but probably stung. Her hands, which were normally calloused and sporting the occasional blister or scab, were now raw and distressed. She didn't think she'd ever seen the Hofferson girl look so undone, and it was... well, uncomfortable, to say the least. She and Astrid had never been all that close, although she did like to think that she was slightly closer to the younger girl than the other members of their friend group, if only because they were the only girls and could stick together when even Ruffnut was tired of dealing with the boys' chaotic tendencies. So she didn't know Astrid well, but she knew her best, and she glanced over at her brother to see if he was at least beginning to realize that something wasn't right. He was just staring off into space and using the blade of the dagger he'd been pointing at Astrid just moments prior to pick something out of his teeth, so, no, apparently not.

She rubbed her arm uneasily and stared back at her sort-of-but-not-really friend. "So... you okay?" When the other girl didn't say anything, she pressed a little harder. "You never told me why you were sleeping on our porch?"

Astrid shifted and looked down at her hands. She began to pick around a scab on her knuckle. "My mom and I got in a fight."

Her voice was even and vague, but Ruff could tell it was still too soon. She scratched the side of her head. Growing up with Tuff had required little obligation to exercise her empathy factor- or any emotions that she would want to beat someone up for disclosing, really- so she was understandably at a loss. "...Do you want to talk about it?"

This time Astrid looked at her. Ruffnut didn't know what to do, so she sort of shrugged and forced a smile that came out looking nervous. The other girl stared at her somewhat mistrustingly before looking away and giving a small shake of her head with an unreadable expression. "You'll find out soon enough."

There were so many questions whirling through her head- which was giving her a headache because her brain wasn't used to puzzling over something so much, either- but she refrained from asking any for Astrid's sake and hopped off the porch, trying to appear indifferent. "Whatever. Let's just go to breakfast. I promised I'd kill Tuff right afterwards. You can help, if you want. The more the merrier."

Tuffnut, now paying attention to the conversation, scoffed and pulled the dagger away from his teeth. "I'd like to see her try. She doesn't even have her axe." This however didn't seem to stop him from hiding his dagger back in his pocket- just in case.

Ruffnut was about to explain how girls didn't need to use silly blade-sticks to beat someone to the ground when, as if just noticing that she had been unarmed all along, Astrid's eyes grew wide and she scrambled to her feet, looking around for her cherished weapon. The twins, more or less startled and unsure what to do, stepped out of her way as she turned the entire porch inside out, checking everywhere and anywhere at least three times. Then, realizing that her axe was nowhere to be found, she jumped off the porch and started hurrying towards the forest without so much as a simple 'goodbye.'

"Wait- Astrid!" Ruffnut called just as she disappeared beyond the treeline, but either the girl didn't hear her or didn't care. She looked at her brother bewilderedly, and for the first time, he reciprocated the look with just as much confusion.

* * *

Astrid ran through the forest, her uncharacteristically loud footsteps pounding against the dirt floor with the stealth of a pack of stampeding yaks. But at the moment, she wasn't trying to be silent. She was trying to find her axe.

After she ran out of the house the night before, she had let her feet guide her someplace safe while her brain malfunctioned and imploded within her skull. She had ended up in her haven that was the forest, and almost immediately she had started slashing and whacking at the trunks of its trees with wild screams and cries that she didn't even know she could produce. Even after she got showered with a tree's worth of splinters and ruined her hands and stressed her muscles far beyond any workout she'd ever done before, she did not stop. She couldn't risk boiling over in public. That would only do more damage to her dilemma, if that was even possible at this point. No, she needed to empty her soul out, and she needed to do it all right now, even it took all night. Which it did.

Everything after that became fuzzy. She just remembered suddenly feeling very empty and very hollow and very very tired, and her body was on the brink of collapsing. There was no way in Hel that she was going to go home then- and possibly ever again, if she could help it- so she tried to think of the next best option. And somehow she ended up at the Thorstons', and, well, the rest was history.

But somewhere between ending her paroxysm and crashing on the twins' porch, she had lost track of her axe. The same axe that her father had given to her for her eighth birthday, the one she'd dragged everywhere every day since, the one that he had not only taught her how to use, but how to use it exceptionally enough to make her the most advanced Viking of her age. The one that, though she would never admit it, she had kept clutched in her hand every night for the weeks following her father's death until she realized that clinging to his memory wasn't going to raise him from the dead. The one that, even after that, still managed to bring her hope that he was at peace, and hope that she could eventually find peace of her own.

 _Maybe you're just overreacting,_ the rational part of her mind told her. The other part of her mind screamed over it, ordering her to _panicpanicpanicPANIC_.

And panic she did. She followed the sea of damaged trees, both frustrated and faintly impressed at the number of axed trunks. Some of them only had a few scratches, but others appeared as if they had been eaten away at by an army of termites. But there were too many for her to possibly follow a distinct path that may lead her to her lost weapon, and even if she did manage to find a path, there was no way to know for certain that her axe would be there. She might have dropped it on her way to the Thorstons' while passing through a part of the forest whose trees were completely undisturbed. Astrid tried not to overthink it, but her anxiety rendered her with utterly no control over her mind. All she could do was search blindly, crossing her fingers for the extremely lucky chance that she might happen to stumble upon it, and her current panic could be assuaged and she could go back to focusing on the other reasons why her life was crashing down around her.

In the end, however, her actions turned out to be nothing but in vain. It wasn't there. She came to the conclusion that there was no such thing as luck, and her beloved axe, the last memory of her father, was going to rot in the woods. Her already hollow heart suddenly became that much more empty, and everything was entirely numb and inexplicably painful as she admitted defeat and walked back to the village. She didn't just lose her axe. She lost herself.

Astrid wasn't Astrid anymore. She didn't even know who Astrid was.

* * *

Hiccup placed the new sword in the wheelbarrow before wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his gloved hand. Gobber was whistling and pounding away on the other side of the forge and Hiccup was grateful that the older man was staying out of his business, even though it must've been obvious to him that something wasn't sitting with him right. Maybe it was all his nervous energy that had pent up after spending a day and two nights of dreading the inevitable, but while his insides fell apart and burst into flames, the apprentice's motions didn't portray his mental turmoil to the unsuspecting eye. But to someone whom had known him for his entire life, Hiccup knew that Gobber could see the way his hands worked more quickly and a little less precise than usual, even though it wasn't by very much and didn't affect the quality of the weapon by even a fraction.

He hadn't slept in two days. Both the night he received the news and had stayed up dreading and fearing for his future, and the night before, when he had spent the many hours of darkness worrying about what Astrid would do when she finally found out about their engagement. His entire body ached just thinking about it. He didn't even want to begin thinking about what would happen when they were actually getting married. Then he wouldn't be able to sleep for the rest of his life.

A surge of frustration coursed through his body. He still couldn't believe his dad did this. Just marrying him off in general was absolutely _not okay_ , let alone marrying him off to Astrid. He had no idea how Stoick could possibly think that this would be beneficial for anyone involved. He knew that his dad was oblivious and was terrible at decision making and parenting in general when it came to his son, but this reached a whole new level that Hiccup hadn't even prepared for, and trust him when he said he'd prepared for the worst.

Hiccup didn't notice that Gobber had stopped pounding and had been staring at him with a frown on his face until the man actually spoke. "Why don't ye take a break? Get some fresh air. You look like you're 'bout to pass out, and there're a lot of weapons lying around. The last thing ye need is to lose a limb before your wedding."

Just hearing the word made him want to pass out. Hiccup swallowed the bile in his throat and thanked Gobber before stepping out of the forge.

The considerably cooler air hitting Hiccup's flushed and sweating skin did him wonders. His pounding headache was significantly lessened and when his lungs filled with the untainted atmosphere, he felt like he was just learning to breathe again. He was still tired, but at least the edge on his nerves had smoothed out somewhat.

This didn't last long, however, when he saw Astrid's silhouette walking down the street. He was about to enter protocol 'panic mode,' which meant to hide in the forge and pray he could stall confronting her for the rest of his life, but as she neared closer he noticed something about her was incredibly off. Instead of striding across the road with her head held high, she was trudging along and had her arms crossed over her chest, avoiding eye contact with anything and anyone at all costs. He also noticed how unusually unkempt and battered her appearance was, and judging by the look on her face, she didn't get any sleep last night, either. Hiccup didn't know what had happened to her, but he could take a wild guess as to _why_.

Then, as if sensing his staring, Astrid had lifted her head and stared him straight in the eye. A look of anger washed over her features almost instantly. Hiccup's heart skipped seven beats and he wished he could have gone back in time and just stayed in the forge, but then she was walking towards him and there was no way he could turn back now. He had to face this dragon head on- not that he was calling Astrid a dragon, of course.

Astrid stopped three feet away from him. Her expression was the epitome of rage. Her breathing was loud and sped up and her eyes were glowing furiously and her mouth was screwed in a scowl. He let out a nervous laugh and tried to wipe the fear off his face, but knowing himself he was probably failing. She opened her mouth and she looked like she was about to yell something, but suddenly she stopped. She shut her mouth and clenched her fists so tightly that her entire body trembled. Then, as if something had clicked, the anger flooded out of her features, leaving her expression rather empty except for... defeat.

"I need a new axe," she demanded. Her voice was cold and commanding and Hiccup walked back into the forge and got her an axe.

He handed it to her and she took it forcefully. He could have asked her what had happened to her, or why she needed a new axe, or if her axe was broken he could've probably fixed it because that was his job and he knew that axe probably meant a lot to her, but did he value his life? Yes. So he accepted the coins she handed him before she left, and his mouth stayed shut.

* * *

 **Notes:**

 **1\. I tried.**

 **2\. Astrid is not going to murder anyone. I repeat, Astrid is not going to murder anyone. Namely Hiccup, or her mom, or anyone.**

 **3\. The next chapter should be up sooner, but if it isn't, take comfort in knowing that I definitely have not forgotten about this story and am most likely writing for future chapters and planning out where it's going to go.**

 **4\. Also, thanks for all the _phenomenal_ support. You guys are crazy!**

 **Next Chapter : In the midst of it all, neither of them had actually accounted how the village was going to react. Not that it mattered- nothing could have prepared them for it.**


End file.
